Why I Don't Offer Day-Of Coordination (and why I think no one should)

Andy Anthony, Wedding Planner (Headshot taken by No Rules Photography)

It's a common occurrence that I get a new client inquiry in my inbox asking for "just day-of help" because they've got everything planned and just need someone to make the day run smoothly. And it doesn't matter that there is no package on my Services page that is Day-Off Coordination and that my form requires them to tell me which package(s) they're interested in, they still ask, even though by all accounts my smallest package is more than they're looking for. And so I typically reply (if I'm available on their date) and explain that I don't do Day-Of and what my smallest package entails and leave the choice up to them. Occasionally it leads to a booking, but usually not because I'm not offering what they want (and that's okay honestly!). So WHY don't I offer Day-Of Coordination? And why do I think no one should either?

Firstly, it's a pretty unfeasible job! Executing weddings (which is what planners and coordinators ultimately do) comes with TONS of details and knowledge. Expecting someone who is entirely unfamiliar with the wedding plans to come in with sometimes very little prep is truly asking the impossible. So I contend that someone jumping in at the last minute to execute what took sometimes a year or two to plan is a laughable idea.

I tried to offer this early on when I started working in the weddings space (I'd already been an event planner for about a decade) and found myself stressed and frantic as I chased the day, instead of calmly and confidently leading the day along, as it should be and as I do now.

When you really think about it, it's wild that this role is still considered industry standard, and despite that most coordinators don't even offer Day-Of anymore (many do Month-of or Two-month of, for example), the term persists.

So yeah, I just don't like to work that way and so I don't. My planning packages are broken up by how much labor I'm performing vs the client, but in all cases, I'm fairly enmeshed in their wedding plans so that, by the time the Big Day rolls around, I know everything (or most everything) that was planned and should be happening. This is why I rebranded my smallest package from Coordination to Planning Lite, because, even though it's the least amount of labor for me, it's still a level of planning that makes me and my team feel secure and assured to do our jobs. It includes creating the wedding day timeline (more on that in a bit), creating the floorplan/site plan/ layout/site map, or collaborating with the venue on it as some venues prefer to own this pieces, and working with the client as soon as they sign with me, whether that's a year out or six months out (with my expertise and advice always included), so that I'm along for the ride and fully prepared.

In this package, there is a lot of trust I have to grant the client that they give me everything, from contracts to basic details to a list of every pieces of decor I'm placing. So that does mean, from time to time, I don't have every piece of information because they've simply neglected to tell me, but those cases are few and far between!

And a decent amount of coordinators do the same labor and still call it coordination, and I'm not here to tell them they're wrong; rather, I just wanted the package name to reflect the level of service I see myself and my team as providing.

Which brings me to writing the timeline. I will only work off of a timeline that I've written, both because I am confident in my expertise and don't want to work off a poorly written timeline, but also, because I've written it and edited it, I'm super familiar with it. Does that mean that the client doesn't collaborate on the timeline? Absolutely not! They should and do collaborate on it, because it's their day, and some clients already have a draft started that I can work off of, but I can tell you client timelines are always missing tons of important information and I've edited the timing every time to make sure the day flows smoothly. And does that mean that the other vendors don't collaborate on the timeline? ALSO absolutely not! I work with every vendor to collaborate on the timeline. Every vendor is an expert in their field and, not only do I want them to feel empowered and supported in their piece of the day in what they're performing and what they need to do their jobs, but the day always flows more smoothly when I've gotten vendor feedback and they've told me what they need in order to execute their piece.

In short? I'm good at what I do and doing that requires a lot of input, but, in owning my role, in owning every part of the wedding day, I'm able to execute the wedding from start to finish with precision, cool-headedness, and, dare I say, a little panache to boot.

So my final plea to the wedding industry is: please kill the term Day-Of Coordination! Coordinators have a hard enough job without added utterly impossible expectations on top of it.

Please allow me to leave you with one final pro-tip: if you're not hiring a professional coordinator, "hire" your most type A friend to do the job (and they cannot be in the wedding party because there won't be time), pay them a little (or gift them a thank you something), put a simple contract in place to protect all parties, bring them into the plans at least a month out and meet with them to make sure they know everything, make them a binder with contracts, timelines, a contact sheet, and all details, and empower them to be in charge. Not everyone can afford a professional coordinator or planner, but that doesn't mean your day needs to suffer because of it!

Happy wedding planning,

Andy <3